With those words, Fiona Apple, explains what she hasn't been doing for the last six years and thusly begins her brilliant new album, Extraordinary Machine.

This new disc was well worth the wait. Mostly because Fiona isn't the type to sell out or even mellow out, like so many of her contemporaries. (See Liz Phair, Alanis Morissette, etc.) I have loved Fiona since her days as a "Shadowboxer." Even when she was hanging out in dirty bathtubs in the brilliant video for "Criminal," directed by Mark Romanek. In the Director's Series, Fiona talks about the grief she got as a result of that video and how it was supposed to be "tongue-in cheek" but she was just so sullen. Mark Romanek asked her if she could "not be so sad." In retrospect, Fiona admits to liking the video and comments that her sadness adds a layer of creepiness to the whole affair.

Then there was the MTV Awards speech in which she declared: This world is bullshit. Which was a decidedly Frances Farmer-esque thing to say. I was hooked. This girl is as f*cked up as I am, I thought and I was right. But in the years that followed, she had an affair with PT Anderson and then basically disappeared. I was upset to learn, via the "Free Fiona" internet campaign that her Extraordinary Machine was being held captive by her record company because they thought it had no commercial value. As it turns out, the delay was mostly Fiona, as she was sitting around watching Columbo reruns and probably regretting having shown her panties on TV. Finally, she enlisted Mike Elizondo (who has worked with Dr. Dre) to finish producing the album. Half expecting a hip-hop hybrid mess, I was pleased to hear Fiona at her best. The album is good, really good. And I suggest you get it immediately.

Or you can just sit around watching Columbo reruns, lamenting the fact that this world is bullshit.