The Fall of Michael Jackson
As Michael Jackson made his way into the Victoria Palace theater in London, he fell, in what media analysts say is a weak attempt to emulate the world wide sympathy (and press) garnered by his arch-nemesis, Madonna. As you remember, Madge fell from a horse (gifted to her by her husband, one-time movie director, Guy Richtie) on her 47th birthday and suffered several broken bones, but still managed to film a television commercial for the new Motorola ROKR phone, only weeks later.
Michael, however, has no such endorsement deals in the works. Though ticket sales for the stage version of the movie "Billy Elliot" (which Michael was attending at the Victoria, when he fell) will undoubtedly benefit from this most unfortunate incident. Witnesses outside the theater described the tense moment when Michael went down.
"He was there and the he wasn't," said Constance Bunbury, 56, of Manchester. "It was like he disappeared!" After the fall, witnesses say, Michael Jackson stood up and went in to see the show. He sustained no injuries and lost no endorsement deals because of the incident. The outpouring of emotional support from other celebrities has been tremendous. Tom Cruise, fresh from inseminating Katie Holmes, had this to say: "When I was jumping up and down on Oprah's couch....I almost fell. It was scary."
From her Malibu rehab facility, Courtney Love released the following press release, via a blurry fax: "I fall down twenty times a day and I'm not on the f*cking news! I'm on the f*cking ground right now!!" A spokesman for Miss Love confirmed that she is in negotiations to replace Kirstie Alley in the third season of "Fat Actress" immediately following her release from rehab. This is not a condition of her parole.
Meanwhile, outside the London Kabbalah Center, Madonna was asked for her reaction to the Michael Jackson fall.
"Michael who?" She replied, before climbing into a mini Cooper limousine, chauffeured by her husband, former film-maker, Guy Ritchie, who was overheard mumbling the words "Stupid Gifthorse!"
Spokesmen for Michael Jackson say that "the fall" in no way deters MJ from seeking out cutting edge, live entertainment, like a stage version of the movie "Billy Elliot," in the future. Jackson was in London recording a charity record for the victims of Hurricane Katrina, just as he did for the Tsunami disaster. When asked about the latest tragedy, the earthquake in Kashmir, Michael replied: "I think it's great! So inspiring... I've actually written songs for almost any natural disaster. So whatever God decides to do, I will have a single ready to go."
The video for Jackson's latest, "Can You Feel It," to benefit victims of the earthquake, is set to shoot next week in Bahrain, with Tom Cruise directing.
Michael, however, has no such endorsement deals in the works. Though ticket sales for the stage version of the movie "Billy Elliot" (which Michael was attending at the Victoria, when he fell) will undoubtedly benefit from this most unfortunate incident. Witnesses outside the theater described the tense moment when Michael went down.
"He was there and the he wasn't," said Constance Bunbury, 56, of Manchester. "It was like he disappeared!" After the fall, witnesses say, Michael Jackson stood up and went in to see the show. He sustained no injuries and lost no endorsement deals because of the incident. The outpouring of emotional support from other celebrities has been tremendous. Tom Cruise, fresh from inseminating Katie Holmes, had this to say: "When I was jumping up and down on Oprah's couch....I almost fell. It was scary."
From her Malibu rehab facility, Courtney Love released the following press release, via a blurry fax: "I fall down twenty times a day and I'm not on the f*cking news! I'm on the f*cking ground right now!!" A spokesman for Miss Love confirmed that she is in negotiations to replace Kirstie Alley in the third season of "Fat Actress" immediately following her release from rehab. This is not a condition of her parole.
Meanwhile, outside the London Kabbalah Center, Madonna was asked for her reaction to the Michael Jackson fall.
"Michael who?" She replied, before climbing into a mini Cooper limousine, chauffeured by her husband, former film-maker, Guy Ritchie, who was overheard mumbling the words "Stupid Gifthorse!"
Spokesmen for Michael Jackson say that "the fall" in no way deters MJ from seeking out cutting edge, live entertainment, like a stage version of the movie "Billy Elliot," in the future. Jackson was in London recording a charity record for the victims of Hurricane Katrina, just as he did for the Tsunami disaster. When asked about the latest tragedy, the earthquake in Kashmir, Michael replied: "I think it's great! So inspiring... I've actually written songs for almost any natural disaster. So whatever God decides to do, I will have a single ready to go."
The video for Jackson's latest, "Can You Feel It," to benefit victims of the earthquake, is set to shoot next week in Bahrain, with Tom Cruise directing.
